Expectations: that date or relationship that didn't end up the way you thought it would.

The lovely Lin facilitated last night at the Women's Library asking :

what expectations did you have in a relationship, or getting together with someone, which didn’t actually come true. Our responses were: “didn't expect to have a partner obsessed with baby wipes – but when the relationship breaks up and your toilet is irredeemably blocked you belatedly find out about this little peccadillo, only expectation is to have a good time and when you stop having a good time you should reconsider the relationship, often refreshingly surprised by what you didn’t expect, to have a partner who is also a really good friend, manage their expectations by starting off with a first date at a cheap joint, be mindful of what your own expectations are, you can overlook things that don’t come up to your expectations as long as the basic stuff is met, i.e. they don’t murder grannies (or put baby wipes down the toilet), if they’re a smoker I’m shocked, when you’re taken for a drive and then they expect a ‘park up’ and you sit in excruciating silence (ouch), sometimes you’re unaware that people are sending you signals that they are attracted to you so you unwittingly trample their expectations, an ex-partner who doesn’t expect to sleep in the spare bed when she comes visiting, get the uncertainties out of the way and just go to bed with them, have an “8 date rule – but sometimes 6 becomes the new 8”, when you’re asked in for coffee and then jumped on it can be very disturbing – especially because you didn’t even get the coffee. And it was probably instant.”